To be honest, my life has been total chaos most of the time. I have tried several times to "clean up my messes" but, there was no time for cleaning.
These past few months, I have been redirecting my thoughts and efforts to making my life, MY LIFE. I do have children and a husband but, I have been making time for me and getting myself on track. I want to succeed in my education, my spiritual health, my psychosocial health and most of all, my physical health. I have started working out again. I am meditating on a regular schedule and I am working on my unhealthy habits of negative thinking and some social habits. All of it will come in time. And, for once in my life, I am allowing this time to manifest.
I think that on a scale from 1-10, my physical wellbeing is at a 7. I take pretty good care of myself. The thing that I really let get me down in this area is the stresses of trying to make everyone happy, and not giving myself the relaxing time or exercise time that I need. I am feeling better physically now that I am allowing this time for myself. My spiritual well being is at an 8. I have my faith and I follow it well, I do not devote enough time to my studies, and I think that I could always use a bit more of nature time in my life. My psychological well being is a 6. I know that there are a lot of issues about my past that I am working through. I am very hard on myself for not being able to just let some things go. I know that eventually, I will be able to move past some of the things that keep me from being a normal person without open wounds to care for. My ego keeps them open for what ever reason. I dislike this very much. So, with that said, I am working on that too. My husband is my best friend, and he is my biggest supporter and a great listener. I know that in this case, time will heal all wounds.
I have set goals and have a plan for developing in these areas. First, I need to stop worrying about little stuff. Then, I need to quit smoking. I try! I don't smoke very much. Just do it when I'm stressed. My doc tells me he can not believe that as much as I work out and as well as I eat, I smoke. So, that stresses me out too! I am checking out alternatives. I need to spend more time with nature and read spiritually growing materials. I am making more time for me, so that is being accomplished. I have also decided to volunteer at the animal shelter and I start this week! I would also love to make a little more time for meditation and my yoga. I am such a better person when I can get that 20 to 60 minutes a day. I have made time to meditate almost once a day for the past 3 months. I would like to make it absolutely everyday.
Speaking of meditation. The relaxation exercise this week in my opinion, was awesome! I have done it several times. The first night, I did it before I went to sleep. I was up for 2 hours after I completed it. I had so much energy! I have to do it earlier in the day. I feel so relaxed and "away" from normal life, its like a mini vacation. I have this exercise saved on my computer and will be using it everyday. I love the visualization of the chakra's and the channeling of each one with the color. Awesome stuff. I have another one that I enjoy that is similar to this.
Blessed be, Angela
Love to hear you making time for YOU! I know for myself, as a wife and mother, it is easy to lose a good part of your identity when you are taking care of everyone else and your own needs, or even wants get put in the back burner. I have put my husband through law school (3 yrs) and worked multiple jobs due to his illness when for four years he was unable to work. It is a challenge to put forth the idea that any time taken for yourself, away from the family, is actually benefiting them by benefiting yourself. You are very strong to realize this an implement plans to meet your goals.
ReplyDeleteBest Wishes always,
Christine Dixon
Our scores were somewhat similar. Chaos and I know each other very well. My mother's middle name is Chaos. She tries to reek havoc in my life when she can and when I let her. I am now at a point in my life again where I feel balanced, whole, and happy. I need to pray more and feel more comfortable in my spiritual life. You are great motivation!
ReplyDeleteSincerely,
Sara G
Angela,
ReplyDeleteGood luck with all the goals that you are trying to achieve; it is always a good thing to take of yourself as you said YOUR LIFE. In speaking to my wife one of the things that she always says is that she has to find time for herself, since we have 2 kids; some of the things that she does is have girls night with her girlfriends where they go to dinner and just talk, reading or just sit on the couch and watch television just to relax. I think that everyone should find time for themselves no matter what is going on around them or in the world. Without that sense of peace it is sometimes difficult to take care of yourself and even others.
Good for you, Angela,
ReplyDeleteI find that some of my coworkers seem to define themselves by others in their lives. As individuals, they seem almost invisible. One coworker went through a particularly painful divorce, but she came out of it stronger, though it was not until she realized she had to take some time to be herself. She had two children and they were young, but she still had to explore who she was before she could help her children cope with their new situation. Thanks for sharing.
Good morning Angela, it is nice to read that you are taking time for yourself because it is not only essential to you but to the people around you. I think most of us have something that has hurt, angered or scared in the past. my way of dealing with it is to leave it where I think it should be in the past. It might not be the best approach, but it works for me.
ReplyDeleteIt was great reading about your positive outcome with the relaxation exercise. I am going to dedicate an hour this weekend for this specific exercise. I hope my outcome will be as positive as yours.
Caroline Y. Mckinstry
Hello Miss Angela,
ReplyDeleteI loved reading your post. It was so honest and heartfelt. You already have won that battle because you know what is right and wrong. Its so easy to loose yourself when your married with children. It wasn't till My children were grown and I traded up with a new husband did I even start to think about myself. Its so easy to get lost in chaos of a family.
I am a closet smoker, have been for years, even during my personal training career. But nobody ever knew......I have tried to quit over 20 times with months of success. I always went back, now I put on a shower cap, gloves and a cape to smoke in the corner of my garage, maybe only one or two times per day, but I still do it....I do plan on quitting this nasty habit.....lol......Good luck my friend...
Warmest Wishes,
Jill Gazelle